Faith

God, You are my God! I can't get enough of You! I've worked up such hunger and thirst for God, traveling across dry and weary deserts. Psalm 63

I was so proud, so moved by my daughter today. Seeing spiritual maturity in my child is moving. It reminds me when I am perhaps at my lowest, that there really is a God. I am certain that He timed that moment just for me today. The youth choir sang a beautiful song about faith today, and as I watched and listened to my daughter and her sweet friends sing such precious words of encouragement I found my spiritual state lifted. Another week gone by, and another rejection for a ministry job for Ryan has left us at or very near the bottom. Emotions running high, questions flooding through our hearts and minds, and we find ourselves simply saying, "Okay, we're done." We find ourselves at a place in which somehow, some way we feel like God's gonna have to move the mountain to us cause we can't muster the strength to go a step further. Weary, broken, spent....how many other words to describe it? I read a bit more of David Crowder's "Praise Habit" this afternoon and found some of his words to be particularly striking. Here's what grabbed me:

'It seems a vicious and familiar trend of God to lead His own into wildernesses. Usually we look around and see nothing but sand while anger rises inside. We think we should be anywhere but the middle of heat and dust.
We always assume that the desert is not where we belong. Perhaps it was too subtle, but if we would have paid attention we might have felt His hand with delicate softness take ours, and our fingers slowly interlock, and then the gentle pull away from the green grass and the mountain springs.'

As difficult as our circumstances may be, it is evident that God intended for this to happen. We didn't just land here because of a chance roll of the dice. He has purposed us for this moment just as much as He purposed us for every moment that occurred before. Our faith is intended to be tested, stretched, challenged to result in stronger, wiser and greater faith on the other side. Life is going to hand us many challenges and the green grass, the glorious mountain tops will be so much more than we could ever ask for. God wants us to get to the bottom of ourselves to truly know how desperately we need Him, and to hear Him speak His plan over our lives when we are truly ready. I have no doubt He has a purpose and a plan for me and Ryan, and I believe He is going to begin revealing it to us very soon. I hope and pray we both continue to cling to His presence, His Word and His love for us.

Comments

The Mom, Leah said…
Andrea, you are beginning to climb that mountain, out of the deep valley. As you climb, look back at the sand. See the footprints? There is but one set because God is carrying you through this difficult time. Keep trusting. Give it all, give it all, give it all to Jesus.
Anonymous said…
I am with you. If you saw Emily laughing on stage, it was because she saw me crying! It was so touching to see them singing their hearts out for Jesus.

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