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Showing posts from September, 2011

Live for Today

It’s the focus we should have each day. Yes, we need to have a healthy outlook on life, make wise preparations for our future. Here is the “but”—don’t worry about tomorrow. Who does that?! You know there aren’t very many of us out there that can say we do not worry. If you don’t worry then I have one thing to say to you and please know I say this without the intention to offend—You are not normal. Here is the point and let this sink in: Life is filled with worry—We are filled with the Holy Spirit! No worries—Give God Glory! As I write it, read it, try to absorb it I will admit to you that it takes me some time to really get it. It is not in our nature to praise God in the midst of the worst of circumstances. Here is the path we need to take. When we reach the end of ourselves, we must let go and let God! Let God love us, cover us with His peace, His grace, His mercy, His strength, His power! It is there for us and always available to us, but somehow the weight of our circum

Perception

Watch this: God's eye is on those who respect him, the ones who are looking for his love. He's ready to come to their rescue in bad times; in lean times he keeps body and soul together. We're depending on GOD; he's everything we need. What's more, our hearts brim with joy since we've taken for our own his holy name. Love us, GOD, with all you've got— that's what we're depending on. Psalm 33:18-22 (MSG) Perception: The quality, state, or capability, of being affected by something external; An idea; A notion. When we are in the midst of a struggle, our perception can cause a great deal of grief, fear, doubt, anxiety, frustration. As we walk through this struggle day to day, some are better than others. The past 48 hours have been particularly heavy for me. I am certain satan is having a big party thinking he’s won some kind of control over me because I haven’t been dealing with any of this very well. How to

Our Great Provider

I am astounded daily at what is happening in our country; and yet, I am even more astounded by how God provides so perfectly. No matter how bad things may appear to be here on earth, He is still on His throne! He does not change and will not be changed by our circumstances. We may be knocked around, beaten up, pulverized, ground up and spit out by what life sends our way--but God is still God and He will take care of us every step of the way. I was burdened today by an article I read about the poverty in our nation. It is heartbreaking, frustrating, so unbelievable to read about these people and how one moment they had secure jobs, raising a family of their own, and now they find themselves in a completely different and what seems like impossible situation. I realized as I read on, trying to swallow this information down just how close every single one of us is to being in their situation. What do you do, how to you go on, when does it get better? I read in my devotional today a

Spiritual Companionship

It seems that I have managed a couple of sizable waves this week, waves of intense uncertainty, anxiety, and very tangible brokenness. For whatever reason, God allows it to overwhelm me to the point I realize I cannot take it much longer, and then it washes over me….His peace. There’s no visible movement that can be detected with my eyes, no audible voice in my ears, just a reassuring wave that flows through my heart and soul. My devotionals have been centered around Elijah in recent days, and what lessons I am learning! It is a fresh reminder to me of how in the most desperate, fearful and lonely days of his life, God was there and provided so much for him. He specifically provided a spiritual companion to him in the person Elisha. I can immediately identify in my life right now “Elisha’s”. You know who you are! You have given me such encouragement, such strength, such motivation, such relief and comfort, in my weakest, angriest, most depressed moments. God is good, He knows

What are you doing here?

My devotional today was more on Elijah and dealing with the people's unbelief, their turning to false gods and so today we find him running away and freaking out because of Queen Jezebel's threats. I think I would run too if I were in his shoes. So I am reading along and this question God spoke to him, just struck me and I found myself hearing God say it to me. "What are you doing here?" What am I doing here? What is the point of what we are doing if we feel unfulfilled, useless, just plain worn out from waiting for what's next? Now understand a lot of this is feelings of utter desperation given our current circumstances. Like a great majority of the country we are still struggling to find a job for Ryan that pays at least what we need to make rent each month, our living expenses. A family of six living on what we are making is well, barely making it. We literally are not looking much further than beyond our week because we don't know how we will pay t

Required of me

I am not proud of it, in fact, it is something I am ashamed to admit. There are moments I am utterly at the end of myself and drowning in thoughts of panic, anxiety, overwhelming doubt because of what life has handed me today. Yesterday on my way home from work I found myself asking God, "What more do You require of us?" I could go on and on, the flood of emotions, questions, all of it. The human mind can send you spiraling into a very deep, dark hole if we allow it. But, somehow as I was trying to push myself above the waves of these thoughts, I started to hear the song by Christy Nockels in my head after hearing it twice yesterday, the words circling over and over, "Waiting here for You with my hands lifted high in praise!" Once again, I found I was at the end of myself and I didn't know what else to do, I literally said to God, "I don't know what else to do except give You praise! Even in this very moment, I know You are still so good!"

I am weak, He is strong!

Coming off of a holiday weekend that should have been a much needed rest for us, has instead ended with very little rest. My heart is broken, it is not at ease, it is tired, it is weary, just so weary. I have been absorbing, lapping up scripture and any resource I can find these past few weeks as we've waited with great anticipation to know if this door would remain open for a position for Ryan. Yesterday that door closed, and we find ourselves crumpled in the floor in front of that closed door, disappointed, heartbroken, frustrated. It was hard not to get our hopes up, when what appears to be a great opportunity comes along. After a much needed phone conversation with my mom this morning, I began to dig deeply into the Word. Mom pointed me to Psalm 147, and how appropriate! In particular verse 10: The strength of a horse does not impress him; how puny in his sight is the strength of a man. My study Bible led me to another scripture in 2 Corinthians 12:9-10: "My graciou

Well, it's an answer...

It's not the answer we'd hoped and prayed for, but it is an answer. I know You've got our best in mind, Lord, but we are just so stinkin' tired. We will not lose our hope and our resolve to trust You, as hard as it is to stand here, and see the door closed. We love You and we believe something good is coming for us soon. I don't have much to say today, but found something that fits. His Billows "All thy waves and thy billows are gone over me" (Ps. 42:7). They are HIS billows, whether they go o'er us, Hiding His face in smothering spray and foam; Or smooth and sparkling, spread a path before us, And to our haven bear us safely home. They are HIS billows, whether for our succor He walks across them, stilling all our fear; Or to our cry there comes no aid nor answer, And in the lonely silence none is near. They are HIS billows, whether we are toiling Through tempest-driven waves that never cease, While deep to deep with clamor loud is calling; Or a