You know your are getting older when the body hurts a little more than it used to. I have been getting myself back into shape the past couple months in hopes that this is the real deal. I want to make these changes for life, really consistent about what I put in my mouth and living a more active lifestyle. So far I have had a great start, but it is the long road ahead that counts most. It is a daily fight for me with my mind and my body, starting when the alarm goes off. I wish I could have just fifteen more minutes, then I'll be good to go. It is that first initial step out of bed that is the starting point for my day, and I am off! Life is non stop with three kids, a husband, a house to take care of, a job, church stuff, extracurricular stuff, appointments, errands, etc. Where does the time go that I should have to get it all done? Why do I always feel like there is not enough time in the day to do it all? It is a bit unnerving to think going back to work full time will put even more of a crunch on my time. I had a great interview Monday and got the unofficial offer today. I am excited, but with some reservations. I worry about how my kids will adjust, especially Rylee. My daughter is very shy, anxious over little things and I am sure it will be hardest on her. I think it will be hard on Bailey at first, but once the routine gets underway he won't even notice the difference. AJ, my little one, will most likely bounce out of it like Bailey, but I know the initial separation will be tough on him. I hope I am not too hard on Ryan through this, expecting him to pick up some of the slack even though he is working too. Hopefully we can maintain some sort of balance, but we will have to do some rearranging. We will all have to make some adjustments, but we'll be fine. I know this will be a good, good thing for us. The Bible tells us not to worry about a thing, God has got it all under control. I believe that, and although I have my frazzled moments, I know more and more that I have a good God I can count on to take care of all our needs. Whether it is an achy body, a frazzled mom, an upset child, or changes in routine He's going to meet us where we need Him most. I am so relieved to know that and to be reminded of that everyday.
Joy and Light
Early Tuesday morning January 2, 2024, I got a call that my Mom was slipping away and the family should come. We knew she was not doing well these past couple of weeks as she had developed pneumonia and covid, and she was struggling just to manage breathing. When I arrived, the nurse brought me in to Mom's bedside, and quietly stepped out to give me some time alone with her before my Dad and my brother arrived. I cried like I have never cried before in my life, and went to my knees beside her, resting my hand on her arm. I have no words to describe what it felt like in that moment, the finality and the reality of it. My brain understood she was gone, no longer there. But my heart, regardless of how far gone Mom had been for years now..... my heart was suddenly flooded with the feelings, the sounds, the memories of her across my entire life, rushing through my head in that moment all at once. It felt like time kind of stopped, so I could have a moment to take it all in, co
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