What are you doing here?

My devotional today was more on Elijah and dealing with the people's unbelief, their turning to false gods and so today we find him running away and freaking out because of Queen Jezebel's threats. I think I would run too if I were in his shoes. So I am reading along and this question God spoke to him, just struck me and I found myself hearing God say it to me.
"What are you doing here?" What am I doing here? What is the point of what we are doing if we feel unfulfilled, useless, just plain worn out from waiting for what's next? Now understand a lot of this is feelings of utter desperation given our current circumstances. Like a great majority of the country we are still struggling to find a job for Ryan that pays at least what we need to make rent each month, our living expenses. A family of six living on what we are making is well, barely making it. We literally are not looking much further than beyond our week because we don't know how we will pay this bill or that bill and somehow, God provides it. Ryan continues to search and apply online, through word of mouth, taking up every offer extended his way for a possible job opening. As we have watched more doors close in the past nine months, it is becoming very clear to us that God has been sending us a very clear message:

Trust in Me! I will take care of You!

This morning as I drove in to work I had this conversation with God. I said once again, I recognize Lord, that You are in control, but a very large part of my mind does not get it. I don't know what we are doing here! So, that is my answer to today's question: I don't know! All I do know for certain is that He has a plan for me and for Ryan and for our four amazing and absolutely wonderful children. I am weak, I am frustrated, and I am just plain tired of this waiting but Lord, I know You have given me Jesus, I know You will provide Your strength and Your peace just as I need it every day!

Proverbs 16:3 MSG Put God in charge of your work,
then what you've planned will take place.
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