Perception

Watch this: God's eye is on those who respect him,
the ones who are looking for his love.
He's ready to come to their rescue in bad times;
in lean times he keeps body and soul together.

We're depending on GOD;
he's everything we need.
What's more, our hearts brim with joy
since we've taken for our own his holy name.
Love us, GOD, with all you've got—
that's what we're depending on. Psalm 33:18-22 (MSG)

Perception: The quality, state, or capability, of being affected by something external; An idea; A notion.

When we are in the midst of a struggle, our perception can cause a great deal of grief, fear, doubt, anxiety, frustration. As we walk through this struggle day to day, some are better than others. The past 48 hours have been particularly heavy for me. I am certain satan is having a big party thinking he’s won some kind of control over me because I haven’t been dealing with any of this very well. How to explain it, it is hard to admit to it because I don’t want to look like a failure, like I’ve given up on God. I don’t want to expose my weakness, my vulnerable state. Truth is, I have been feeling very weak, very unstable and there are days when God isn’t enough for me. That hurts to admit, but it is where I am sometimes. So, my perception, my view of things as they are is obviously not God’s. In my heart, I know He is so much greater than anything I will face in this life but the battle that goes on between my heart and my mind is exhausting. There are days I don’t feel like hanging on, I would much rather let go and sink into my deep, dark hole and not be found. I don’t feel like making the effort, because I don’t seem to have anything left in me. How amazing, remarkable, extraordinary to know that my faith, my hope is not determined by anything I do. My faith, my hope is in God and because of His supernatural power within me. Last night in my study I found myself rolling Psalm 33 over my heart and mind and there it was—that peace. I couldn’t have found it on my own strength, but because I sought it out and because I knew I was at the end of myself.
The need to change my perception is a daily battle; sometimes it can occur more than once over the course of my day. How good to know that God is not far away, He is right beside me, waiting with open arms.
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