Accountability

“If any of you wants to be my follower, you must give up your own way, take up your cross daily, and follow me” –Luke 9:23 NLT

Last week was a difficult week for me, for our family. We are navigating a new, challenging path with Ryan’s folks as their health issues become more urgent. If you have been in touch with us over the course of this year, then you know 2018 has been rough. Illness, hospitalization, therapies, surgery, and rehab, and so on. I don’t know how we would manage through it without the support of our family and friends, our community of faith that surrounds us. The meals, the phone calls, the visits with Ryan’s folks, the prayers, the encouragement, the accountability. The intention Christ set for the family of God is evident and flowing beautifully for us, so as I am writing this my heart is overflowing with gratitude.

I felt at times this past week as if I was teetering on the edge of sanity. It is incredibly frustrating and absolutely maddening to watch as circumstances unfold and it seems God is just nodding along the way. He knew all this was going to happen. And I’m just supposed to be okay with this? At the peak of these edge of sanity moments, I found all I could do was whisper to myself, “Breathe. Pray.” And when I couldn’t speak, I collapsed in bed with arms wide, visualizing and meditating simply on this truth: God’s got me. God’s got this. It will be okay.” I have had to remind myself daily, I cannot fix this right now. It’s not up to me. It’s not a burden Father God intends for me to carry. He knows my heart. He knows the emotional, mental, spiritual chaos swirling in my head right now. But I can release it to Him. I must choose to release it all to Him. My struggle to focus is centered entirely on my inability to fully trust God with it all. That’s the heart of it, right there. I can choose to let anxiety rule my head and my heart, or I can release it to my Father God and trust He is enough.

I cannot fully find myself planted securely in this truth without having key people in my life who hold me accountable. It starts with my husband, Ryan. We have been married nearly 24 years, been together longer than that counting the days before we married, and we are not the same. Life has beat us up, attempted to sever the commitment we made all those years ago, and time and time again we have chosen to stay. Our story is not your story, so if you are still reading at this point then please know there is no benefit to comparing ours to yours. Every relationship is unique to the two people who have formed it. In all these years, we have learned a valuable necessity for navigating life, our marriage, our parenting, our ministries: ACCOUNTABILITY. We need it at all times. If you are unable to acknowledge this necessity for yourself, and you cannot identify that you have a consistent form of accountability in your life right now, then get with it, my friend. God did not intend for any of us to live this life in isolation.

So here is my second: He intends for us to live in community. He intends for us to be actively participating in a consistent gathering of Christ followers. I don’t care if you go to a big church, a little church, a house church, or a weekly gathering at a park, whatever. Just choose to do it, engage, participate, make a connection. If your marriage is in crisis, if you or a loved one is struggling with an addiction, if you are dealing with a rebellious child, if you are dealing with a chronic health condition, if you are unemployed, if you are on the brink of depression, whatever your current life circumstances: Seek Accountability. It will be hard, because as human beings most of us struggle to simply acknowledge weakness. So, taking that first step, swallowing pride and inviting someone to step into the pit with us, well-it sucks and it is incredibly humiliating. Here’s truth: God’s love and grace is abundant for you at all times. His mercies are new every single day. This truth alone is what keeps me going! He never fails! He loves, provides, protects and purposes us, and the moment we start to question any of that we must call out the voice of lies for what it is and stand firmly upon the foundation of Christ! It is a daily choice, and it is a life altering choice to live in the abundance and the knowledge of who we are in Christ versus living any other way.

Here is my third and most powerful form of accountability: the Holy Spirit.

“…in Him we live and move and have our being…” (Acts 17:28 NIV)

If what drives you to live, move and breathe is anything less than what Christ intends, then you need to seek out accountability for yourself. I have several dear friends, pastors, mentors I keep in touch with and reach out to regularly for advice, for counsel, and sometimes to simply vent about what is burdening me. I am thankful and I believe wholeheartedly God uses these relationships I have established in my life to keep me grounded. If you don’t have some form of a balance of accountability in your life, then I encourage you to start today. I promise you will find navigating the road of life a little easier when you have it. We can do this, one day at a time and yes-God is good, all the time!

“If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month.” –Theodore Roosevelt