Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him. Psalm 62:5 NIV

There is a resonating message I’ve been hearing God speak over the past week and weekend. I’m learning at this 40something age and as I am challenged day to day to balance my time between my Father God, my family, my friends, school and church schedules, work projects, and volunteer projects, the decision to say no and find time to simply rest is crucial, imperative, and absolutely vital to my physical, mental, spiritual health. Ryan and I have found ourselves this year in a season of waiting. Many doors we have walked toward, have closed. Some are still open, but just a crack it seems. Others are opportunities we are open to but realize it is not something we are ready to step into fully at this point along the pathway of life. So, what’s the resonating message I’ve been receiving?


My entire being screams for order and predictability, and I am much more at ease if in fact things go according to plan or very close to it. I have dreams, goals, plans and I get focused very quickly on what makes the most sense for my life, for my family. There have been sections of my life when I relied more on my vision that God’s vision for my life. It was easier because I had it all in my mind, and on paper, and on my computer, and on my calendar that this is how it should go to meet a successful end. I found my prayer time predominantly shaped by something like this, “God I know the plans you have for me are good and perfect, and I just know you are going to agree with what I have in mind because it just makes so much sense!” Been there? I get ahead of myself, and as a result in my excited state of what could be and what feels right, quickly snowballs into a perspective that is heavily mine and very little of what God intends for me. When it doesn’t work out the way I’d hoped and dreamed and predicted God would bless, my perspective can be smashed to pieces. Crash and burn. And the immediate questions flood my heart, and I’m thrown into the realization that in fact I failed to start with the simple necessity to rest in my Father’s presence. No agenda, no plan of my own creation, but simply accepting the invitation He has open to me every single moment of my life to reside in Him. When we choose to release it all and start with this simple but powerful position of faith, we will be filled and fully capable of receiving what God has for us.

I am deeply convicted in my life now more than ever, to insert a new balance. Some of you have been faithfully praying for me and encouraging me through this season, and I am so thankful for your willingness to support me in this way. It takes time to find a new balance, and it takes sacrifice. It means saying no to certain things to make room for that which God has imprinted upon the heart to follow in obedience. I don’t ever want it to be said of me that I didn’t turn toward God’s specific call upon my heart to go and do something. There will always be things in my life that threaten to distract and ultimately destroy me. There are so many things that could weigh me down, hold me back from being fully in the presence of my Father God and in His good and perfect will. How much time did I waste, how much time have you wasted, being busy for anything other than what our Father God intends for our lives? I need a God perspective, every day, I have a choice to simply reside in Him and adopt that focus.

When I come to Him, offer up what has wrecked my day or what has blessed my day, it is all for the same good He has purposed for my life. I am thankful I have a faithful Father God who is ready to receive me, the good, the bad, the ugly, and continue shaping and directing my life as only He can.
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