New normal

 I was thinking a few days ago, there are blocks of time since my Mom's diagnosis and since her beginning full time care in a memory care facility, that I am living in a new rhythm of life-a new 'normal'.  It's not a 'normal' I would have expected about 9 years ago.  2012 was a year our family did not fully understand the direction we would be going in life.  A job transition we didn't plan for hit us in 2011, and so we put our prayers, hopes, blood, sweat, and tears into doing whatever we could to ride it out.  Entering 2012, we learned quickly the job market was not as healthy where we resided at the time, and as our parents were aging and facing health challenges, we found ourselves exploring the possibility of moving to the Springfield area.  I'll be honest:  we had dreams early on in our marriage to live and work and thrive outside of Missouri and didn't have an interest in coming back here.  We are thankful, and we have been stretched and challenged and blessed by the opportunities God has provided for our family in Tennessee, Colorado and Indiana, but apparently He was preparing us for a doozy of an experience right back where we met in college all those years ago.  If you had told me 10, 20 years ago we'd be doing this, and we would be experiencing the things we have, I wouldn't believe it and would probably come back at you pretty quick with, "No, that won't happen."  How quick we are in a moment, to respond to something that would seem to us to be so hard to believe, because we are so hopeful that God is going to follow through and provide precisely what we want and what our great desire in this life is for ourselves, for our loved ones.  How quick we are to respond by what comes to mind for us, rather than pausing to consider:  "What if God has something completely different for me?"  This is the moment in our spiritual posture we should be fully prepared for God to press in and whisper, "Wait.  Trust Me."  I admit there have been a lot of moments like this in my life that I didn't hear Him because I didn't want to.  I let my heart lead and my emotions get the better of me, and I responded as if God was behind me, waiting for me to turn around and acknowledge His purpose for me.  I didn't always fully accept that God is all around me, resides in me, He goes before me, walks beside me, and comes up behind me to ensure that as His precious and blessed child I will know beyond a shadow of a doubt:  He is for me and His plans for me are good!

When my Mom's condition worsened, and we realized the time had come for us to find full time care for her, my hope and my trust in God was shaken but not broken.  I could have chosen to wallow in despair, the realization that none of us-my Dad, my brother and myself-could take care of her or fix this for her was devastating.   But God placed amazing and resourceful people in our lives to help us move through it and ultimately we were able to hear God's whisper through it, "Wait.  Trust Me."

As we watch the month of October unfold, and another holiday season approaches, we will find more of this new 'normal' sinking in.  We will choose to trust in the God of the unexpected and the unknown, and we will trust His new 'normal' for us as it awakens us each new day.