The road ahead.....

Here comes mid-February 2020, how can that be? It feels like time is practically running me over, as the New Year whizzes by day after day. Ryan and I just celebrated 25 years of marriage in December, and we are in the last couple years of our 40’s ….. Wow! I remember when my folks were this age, and thought that was a long way off for me. As we completed 2019 and enter 2020, we are in a new season of transition. We completed a wonderful season of ministry with Story Church, so thankful to have been part of this loving church family and help launch a new church plant in the Springfield/Rogersville area. As Ryan is grinding away at his IT Degree at MSU, and we look down the New Year ahead of us, we have more questions than answers, but we know this for certain: God is preparing the way for our next steps in this extraordinary life He has given us.

In the last couple years, we have adjusted to a new level of busy in our family with a husband and 2 kids in college, helping with both our parents’ health issues, and figuring out precisely what it is God has for us in ministry. We started feeling somewhat “unsettled” in late 2018/early 2019, particularly as our children (Rylee, Bailey and AJ) were all experiencing some growing pain in their faith. This was a new thing for Ryan and I, having been Pastor’s kids ourselves and our generation just went to the same church where our parents served in ministry. Not so for our kiddos! We have always encouraged them to explore and listen to God’s leading in their faith walk, and so to hear them express their interest in finding something more and seeking a place for themselves was new, different, and refreshing. But it also created a bit of a challenge in terms of navigation. This was not a process we approached lightly or tackled in one family meeting. It was something we had to work through over many months, and it required flexibility on everyone’s part because we had to coordinate this with 2 vehicles. This has been a unique and growing experience for us all, because we have done it completely different than our parents’ did with us. Not that one is better than the other, just different. As a parent watching your children express their desire to grow in their faith and find a church with a student ministry that provides that fulfillment, it is not an easy part of the road of life to navigate. Nobody likes being put under a microscope, and as a pastor’s kid I felt that and honestly resented my parents for it immensely. I didn’t like feeling like everyone was watching me and judging me because I was the pastor’s daughter. The teen years are hell, and the mind of a teenager is an intense battlefield where the greatest enemy is yourself. Years later thankfully I could be honest with my parents about this, but it was difficult at the time for me to admit to them because I didn’t want to disappoint them and adopted the perspective that I should simply do what was expected of me and get through it. I can look back now and see moments I enjoyed being a PK, I loved the experiences my Dad had and our family had serving on mission trips and the extended family we had with his leadership/staff team at each church where God called him. Lifelong friendships that have remained even today with people who influenced and mentored me in my faith journey. I was not able to appreciate any of it then, but as I have grown up I have learned to count my blessings and all that God provided along the way.

I am thankful for my best friend, my partner, my husband Ryan to walk through this season of life together. I was reminded Sunday morning as my son AJ stood between us in worship with his hands lifted high to our amazing Provider God: this is what matters. Right now. To be seated in His presence and participating fully in the life He has given us. I can think back to moments in my teen years, in my college years, in my young married years, and in my middle-aged years, when I found myself in a blurry complacent life-flow. I let time pass with an attitude of just wanting to get through it, or consumed by thoughts of “if-only”. Time wasted. I am seeing through fresh eyes as our children grow into adulthood how truly precious our time is to make an impression that is life-altering and soul-changing. I don’t want my children to see me living life in a way that says I’m done, I’m settling, I’m compromising and the status quo is okay with me. God gave us this life to live set apart and not like the masses on this earth. Sometimes we mess up, we are human and we are going to mess up often. We acknowledge that with our children, we talk openly and hold each other accountable, talk through this process of doing life the best we know how.

So, as we launch into the days ahead, we trust God’s hand upon us all and we look forward to what He is going to do in and through us for His Kingdom purpose. I urge you and encourage you to set your mind on Christ first each day because it makes the bumps in the road a bit easier to navigate when we fully trust the One who is at the steering wheel. Here’s to the road ahead!