At some point I realize this blog thing should be a habit for me, but it has just become another thing for me to check off of my 'to do list'. Working full time in addition to being a mother of three, wife, homemaker, etc., all makes for a rather impossible schedule for me. I don't know how I get anything accomplished. It has always been a day to day thing for me. All is right in my little world if I can just check off what I intended to accomplish for the day. If I don't get it all done, it very naturally spills over to the next day's list. As I age, I hope I am becoming a bit more relaxed although I have the feeling Ryan would protest. I am quite certain he would have a good laugh at that too. Anyway, I cannot believe my grandmother is gone. She passed just two weeks ago today. It doesn't seem real to me. It feels as if I need to call her, check on her, just let her know I love her and I am thinking about her. My heart aches to think about her most times, and I am having a lot of weepy moments. I just miss her sweet presence, the sound of her voice, her encouraging and loving words, the sparkle in her eyes, her infectious laugh, I could go on and on. I just miss her and a lot of the time I feel so cheated to not have more time with her as I'd hoped. I am sure my Dad feels the same, although I think he has dealt with some anger too. I think I'd be angry with God at first too, for just not letting her live a little longer. How selfish is that of us? After all, He knows best especially since He's the one who created us. Loneliness makes us more selfish than we realize we truly are. Somehow at the end of the day, after I have had my human moment, had a chance to purge my heart and mind, I think God just sweeps over me with His perfect peace. Thanks Lord! It's cool how He does that.
Our Great Provider
I am astounded daily at what is happening in our country; and yet, I am even more astounded by how God provides so perfectly. No matter how bad things may appear to be here on earth, He is still on His throne! He does not change and will not be changed by our circumstances. We may be knocked around, beaten up, pulverized, ground up and spit out by what life sends our way--but God is still God and He will take care of us every step of the way. I was burdened today by an article I read about the poverty in our nation. It is heartbreaking, frustrating, so unbelievable to read about these people and how one moment they had secure jobs, raising a family of their own, and now they find themselves in a completely different and what seems like impossible situation. I realized as I read on, trying to swallow this information down just how close every single one of us is to being in their situation. What do you do, how to you go on, when does it get better? I read in my devotional today a...
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