Tears Have Purpose

I’ve always been one to come to tears easily. Whether it is a heartbreaking love story, tragic humanitarian effort story, a beautifully written song, a familiar smell, or a phrase someone said in my life at a time I needed it most. When it hits me just right, I’m a freaking mess. We are talking ugly cry. This past week has been brutal for me for more reasons than one. Life has hit me just right on some things, and I think God prepared me for it to hit in worship last Sunday morning. I’ve sung the song many times, “Closer” by Bethel. I love that song, but it truly crushes me. It crushes me in a good way, please understand. It is one of the few songs I’ve come to know that brings me to a more intimate state of being with my Father God. A state of being that I hadn’t known in my walk with Christ for years I think. Ryan and I have been through some challenging life circumstance the last five years. I can look back over that time and see where God used His Word, the truth of His Word woven into songs like “Closer”, and the intimacy I found in Him when I gave in to His pressing upon my heart to lean more upon Him than I had before; it was precisely timed as He intended for me.

Last Sunday morning, I found myself in that familiar place again near the end of the song, and as I led out the final lines, my heart was lifted and the Spirit moved me in a way that took my voice as the tears flowed. I find at that moment, I have a choice to harden myself and simply focus on finishing the song without crying, or giving in to the impression the Spirit is making upon my heart. This was one of those times when I gave up my attempt to control, and let the Spirit flow through me. Words are reduced to a whisper, all I know to do is say “Thank you, Father!” because no matter how weak I perceive myself to be in that moment, He has provided a moment to remind me afresh how alive and new I am in Him. I find I am far more present in the Father than I was the moment I woke that morning. It is a vulnerability I can choose to embrace, or push away. It is a moment I choose to spread my arms wide and receive, rather than shut Him out and tough it out. It is precisely where He intends for me to be.

‘Could it be that crying is a form of worship? In my case, yes. Instead of running from it or trying to suppress it, this process has taught me to embrace it.
When we pay attention to the things that make us cry, they give us a rare glimpse into who we are at our core.
Sometimes tears mean beauty. They signal recognition. They connect the body with the soul in a way few things can.
Sometimes, crying is our only contribution when we have nothing else to give. For these reasons, tears are a gift.’

(Reflections: Moved to Tears-Finding Meaning in the Experiences that Make Us Cry, Mary Lauren Weimer, http://spiritualityhealth.com/articles/reflections-moved-tears)

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