It's Monday..yet again...

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I find it frustrating how the crazy busy cycle of life has become my excuse for not doing better than I am at this moment. I am at that place again with my health, so tired and so fed up with my current state, so I need to whip it into shape and stop making excuses. It is easier, more comfortable for me to make those excuses. I have a a husband, three children, a full time job, and a schedule full of other activities to keep up with during the week. My day starts at 5:15 am and ends at 11:30 pm. By the time I complete my day at work, get in some form of exercise, fix dinner, bath time, bed time, chores that are waiting for me when I get home like ironing/laundry/dirty dishes--take my pick!--and maybe some time to sit and relax, it is gone. I have no time left, and I am spent, done, ready to crash. Some days I feel like I am running on empty, not fumes, EMPTY. I don't like that feeling, but I find I barely have a moment to slow down and process that feeling. How perfect His timing when He gives me the Word: I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.Phillipians 4:13
I try and get so much done on my own steam all the time, find myself wrestling with God over who is in charge of my life. That is ridiculous, cause the reality comes to me when I realize, "Psh...yeah! I don't have it, never had it and never will have it--God has got it!" It is not comfortable for me to admit that I am helpless, but I can admit I am wrong...with some reluctance. It is that pride thing, why is it so hard? He is still working on me, that I know. I am not perfect, and this day---whether it is Monday or any other day---will go on as I choose to live it. I can let go of my worries and trust Him, carry myself confidently and with joy in my heart, or I can be a miserable, grumpy and worrisome person who cuddles with doubt. I am so thankful for my God--He knows me so well and delivers me without fail.

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